| (no subject) |
[Sep. 26th, 2007|01:35 pm] |
lately,
i feel like i'm not suppose to be here in Memphis.
the people & town are NOT what i thought.
of course i'm waiting it out til may/august because i have a lease & school obligations.
i just dont' understand this town or why people here only care for themselves & not the majority.it's so dirty & not what i want.
no one here is like me.
i've never felt so alone in my life.
i know there is an adjustment period & i hope this passes,BUT
for now i'm unhappy. |
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| Charles is coming to town..... |
[Jul. 26th, 2007|07:30 pm] |
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There's gonna be a show on August 1st at 7:00 at Jon's house. he lives at 319 Swan Lake Dr, Clarksville TN, 37043.
$5 at the door.
Everyone/People he loves please come. I want this to be an awesome kick-off show for his band before they leave on tour!
OH and they're good too!
MORE INFO: www.myspace.com/amden & www.myspace.com/rancidbassfreak
HOLLA!
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| bad week. |
[Jul. 22nd, 2007|08:25 pm] |
my room is no longer my room. there is new furniture and the pictures of my friends are gone.
It is so weird to me that one little day of packing can make me feel ignored & not wanted in my home.
I know that in 20 days my house will be empty & when I come home I will feel like a stranger. It didn't hit me until today that I will not wake up to a 30 pound cat looking and purring at me but to a new town where I'm alone. I know oreo is an animal but I just can't help but wonder what he'll be thinking when I'm not here for 4 months & he is with one less person to adore him.
On top of this feeling I get to deal with the love of my life going on tour across the country where there will be new girls for him to admire(You know the cute/skinny/perfect girls that come to the shows with their cute hair & even cuter outfit.)UGHH.The thought of him cheating on me kills me. I feel so selfish because this is his dream and I feel like I can't be 100% happy for him.
BUT,there is a chance that amden might be coming here on the 1st for a show....that could be good.
OH and i get to be alone on my birthday for the 2nd year in a row! AWESOME!
I need to stop. |
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| orientation and explanations. |
[Jun. 22nd, 2007|12:24 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | incubus. | ] |
this past monday and tuesday i attended orientation. As most of you know I don't like being out of my comfort zone and when i first meet someone I'm more likely to watch than to interact,so I went into with an optimistic spirit and and out- going mind. I failed. I guess the weekend I decided to go was the group of long life BFFS and bro hoes. I really tried to make friends in my group. it didn't work and i ended up leaving early with my parents because i was so upset.
This lead to me having a little breakdown and me finally realizing how alone I'm going to be when I get down to memphis. Of course I know I'm going to be okay and will make a group of amazing friends because I will not depend on charles to be my only friend.
I'm so afraid/excited and have been purposefully distancing myself from people because I can't count on you all to be there when I'm 3 hours away. I know I shouldn't do this I just think that by me doing this it will be a whole lot easier to say good-bye becasue it's only 7 weeks away.
In saying this I"m going to memphis on sunday until tuesday to get closer to some girls so I'll have some friends when I get down there.
I'm then going to the beach for a week. BUT when I get back from the beach and everyone else gets back from Hillmont I'll stop being a recluse for the last couple of weeks I have with you all.
i'm sorry &
I love you.
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| ranting. |
[May. 29th, 2007|02:04 pm] |
I bought this dress today, the neck has an owl on it!
This week my mom is taking some college classes in Jackson, so I am alone with my dad. It is probably the most awkard situation EVER!WE don't talk and I beg my mom to let me come to Jackson and stay with her....I'm pretty sure this is not how a father/daughter realtionship is suppose to work.
I'm done with High School.It is a weird feeling because since i'm not officially a college student i'm stuck in a position where I'm a nothing student.
ALSO, why is everyone pregnant or getting married?it makes me ridiculously jealous and at the moment i wish i was 30 so i could buy cute stuff and live with someone i love.
oh lord,this week is ridiculous. |
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| there is nothing on tv. |
[Apr. 24th, 2007|04:51 pm] |
1. What is in the back seat of your car right now?
geometry book
2. When was the last time you threw up?
april 2
3. What's your favorite curse word?
--
4. Name one person who made you smile this morning?
big ron
5. What were you doing at 8:00 this morning?
sitting in french class
6. What were you doing 30 minutes ago?
walking
7. If you could marry any celebrity today who would it be?
john mayer
8. Have you ever been to a strip club?
no.
9. What is the last thing you said aloud?
answer the phone.
10. What is the best ice cream flavor?
karamel sutra.
11. What was the last thing you had to drink?
water.
12. What are you wearing right now?
yoga pants and tank top
13. Last food you ate?
meatball sub
14. Have you bought any clothing items in the last week?
no.
15. When is the last time you ran?
yesterday.
16. What's the last sporting event you watched?
hockey.
17. Last movie you saw?
casino royale.
18. Who is the last person you sent a message on myspace to?
--
19. Ever go camping?
no.
20. Were you ever an honor roll student in school?
yes.
21. Do you like sushi?
sometimes.
22. Do you have a tan?
yes.
24. Do you drink your soda from a straw?
no.
25. What did your last text say?
i love you.
26. Are you someone's best friend?
yes.
28. Where is your mom right now?
in hopkinsville with papaw
29. What color is your watch?
don't own one.
31. What do you think of when you think of Australia?
finding nemo
32. Ever ridden on a roller coaster?
yes...
33. What is your birthstone?
peridot
34. Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru?
depends.
35. What is your favorite number?
seven.
36 Do you have a dog?
no.
43. What does your first memory of your brother involve?
dont' have one.
44. Biggest annoyance in your life right now?
school.
45. Last phone call?
chuck.
46. Are you allergic to anything??
yes.
47. Favorite shoes that you wear all the time?
black flip flops.
48. What is one thing you've learned about life recently?
life is short.
49. Are you jealous of anyone?
yes.
50. Is anyone jealous of you?
no.
51. Do you own an ipod?
yes.
52. Do any of your friends have children?
yes.
53. What do you work as?
yes.
55. Do you hate anyone right now?
no.
58. How old will you be turning on your next birthday?
18.
59. Have you ever been to Six Flags?
yes.
60. What do you wish for?
can't tell. |
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| memphis. |
[Apr. 22nd, 2007|05:17 pm] |
We found our home in Country Squire. It has 2 bedrooms, 2 baths.
AND the complex and 6 swimming pools!
FRIENDS: it is such an easy drive and right across the street from SUPER TARGET, feel free to come over whenever you'd like.
ALSO, I am happy to say that
me and chuck are back together.
We both agree that even though are lives are ridiculous and different,
we were put on this earth to love the crap out of eachother.
Hope Rivers and Spires was good.
Prom is in 2 weeks!
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| will you help me?! |
[Apr. 12th, 2007|04:34 pm] |
I just got a facebook the other day and one of my networks is U.Memphis '07 and i don't know why because i added U.Memphis '11...........how can i change that so i won't seem like an idiot?!
thanks, i'm stupid.
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| 3r98274kljrawlkga. |
[Mar. 29th, 2007|05:50 pm] |
As most of you know I"m going to France on Saturday.
I am so excited But I'm aprehensive about the people going. They won't understand my purchases or my high heels or why I'm not wearing tennis shoes when we're walking 7 miles a day.
The truth is I know I"m not being practical but who knows when I'll be in France ever again, so I want to make this memorable.......
I Guess I just wish I could bring all of you loves to experience this with me.
I know this sounds ridiculous and I truly am excited I would just be with people I love than people I can tolerate.
On the other hand I'll get to experience amazing things and eat lots of chocolate eclairs...YUM! |
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| party! |
[Mar. 22nd, 2007|02:19 pm] |
Attention:
for those of you who are extremely tired of school and see it as the biggest waste of time in your life........
we only have 7 more mondays left.
holla! |
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| rash. |
[Mar. 19th, 2007|06:42 pm] |
I bought my prom shoes today,the color is called PLATINUM(it will match chuck's tie).
Last night I had to go to the Emergency Room becuase of this really cute rash I have on my elbows and ankles. Turns out to be inflamation of my blood vessels. I had never been in a Hospital setting until last night, so I was a big baby about it. I'm ok,it's just painful and I get to give myself massages to help the blood flow.
fun! |
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| lovers and friends. |
[Mar. 10th, 2007|09:37 pm] |
charles came up from wednesday to today.
it was so fun we got his tux,went to hananoki, and saw the movie Norbit.
even though we are "apart" we have ridiculous amounts of chemistry.
example:
(just call me big lips mcgee)
i'm almost positive that we won't be getting back together anytime soon, but i enjoy his company and conversations more than anyone .i think God put him in my life as one of those really cool people who teaches you things about yourself and for that i am grateful. |
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| i lied. |
[Mar. 4th, 2007|10:53 am] |
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Disciple Now was really great. We talked about how as a woman we were perfectly forme dto be the icing on adam's cake. It's really neat to think of it that way. I shouldn't have been so skeptical. |
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| yuck. |
[Mar. 2nd, 2007|04:24 pm] |
This weekend is Disciple Now. I'm kind of skeptical because we are suppose to be talking about sex all weekend. I'm hoping that we have someone who doesn't stay on task. Let's distract her!
Not to be oboxious but on Wednesday Charles is coming and when I think about it I kind of want to throw up. I don't think it will be awkward,but I've always acted one way toward him and vice versa. What am I suppose to do?!
I'm annoyed.I hope YOU have a good weekend............... |
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| Miss RHS is tonight. |
[Feb. 24th, 2007|06:01 pm] |
: A - AVAILABLE?: not sure.....
B - BEST SPORT?: track
C - CRUSH?: john mayer
D - DOGS NAME?: don't have one
E - EASIEST PERSON(s) TO TALK TO?:chuck
G - GUMMY BEARS OR GUMMY WORMS?: worms
H - HOMETOWN?: nashville
I - INSTRUMENT?:violin
J - FAVORITE JUICE?: apple
K - KIND OF MUSIC?: lots of different stuff
L - LONGEST CAR RIDE?: i don't know
M - MILK FLAVOR?: skim
N - NUMBER OF SIBLINGS?: zero
O - ONE WISH:answers to questions
P - PHOBIA/FEARS?:being alone
Q - FAVORITE QUOTE?: don't have ones
R - REASON TO SMILE?: makes everyone look better
S - SONG YOU LAST HEARD?: "Gravity" -John Mayer
T- TIME YOU WOKE UP TODAY?: 8
U - UNKNOWN FACTS ABOUT ME?:I have a birth mark on the side of my right leg
V - VEGETABLE YOU DONT LIKE?: onions
X - X-RAYS YOU'VE HAD?: back,teeth
Z - ZODIAC/ASTROLOGY SIGN?:Leo |
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| For whom it may concern... |
[Feb. 21st, 2007|06:12 pm] |
I'm really stressed about the upcoming year.Well not really about where I'm going to be it's more along the lines of who I'm going to live with.
there are some options,but I want it to feel right.
I don't want a roomate that I feel obligated to spend my only free time with them and not have my own set of friends.ughhh.
This is really a struggle in my life at the moment so I'm asking for some prayer.
HELP! |
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| Happy SIngles Awareness Day. |
[Feb. 14th, 2007|06:26 am] |
Velentine's day is the worst holiday created.
All it does is make guys feel obligated to buy you candy and flowers and make single girls wonder what they're doing wrong in their life.
yuck. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 9th, 2007|06:26 pm] |
today I got a parking citation in the same exact place I park EVERY time i go down town.
Luckily I have my own checking accoun so I can pay for my ticket without my parents knowing......
On a good note I was scheduled to take the ACT tomorrow but for the first time EVER my parents decided to be logical, giving me the excuse that since I did get excepted to every college and already have scholarships that it isn't necessary for me to take it.Hallelujah!
tell me something good..... |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 29th, 2007|08:13 am] |
This trip to memphis was so real and honest.
I stayed with my mom's friends family, they were amazing.I had my own bathroom!
Saturday Charles picked me up and we ate breakfast and caught up before he went to work. I then spent the day with one of his roomates ashley, which was crazy. When Charles came back from work we went grocery shopping and I made him dinner.It was one of the best dates we had. 4 hours later, he decided that he needed to take a break.
If a break up could go well,that's how this went. He was the so kind and loving and the most emotional person I have ever seen.(this is weird because he usually isn't emotional).
He says he knows that we'll get back together,but he wants to be sure that I'm it.He needs sometime to think.(I think,he'll come around).We've always said that we would not be consistent and break-up before we end up together, but never did I think it would be this soon when I'm moving to Memphis in less than 6 months.......
There will be a light at the end of this tunnel, whether we get back together or if I find someone new. I didn't think I could love someone that much and if I don't get to love Charles again, then I have a whole lot of love to give someone, and that excties me.
In saying this, I'm back into my shell waiting for the light.
My heart hurts.
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 25th, 2007|03:42 pm] |
I have so much to do!!!!
I have 5 pages in English, 2 pages in geometry....
and on top of this I get to write a 5 page research paper!!!
What are they thinking?!
On the other hand I'm going to Memphis this weekend and that will be interesting.......
Have a good weekend,i'll miss you guys and the Heaven/Hell discussion at church on sunday! |
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